


More Time

by somethingtostrivefor



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends: Knights of the Old Republic (Video Games), Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic (Video Game)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Character Study, Dreams and Nightmares, F/M, Flirting, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Missing Scene, Old Republic Era, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Snippets
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-19
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-24 04:25:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18161444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/somethingtostrivefor/pseuds/somethingtostrivefor
Summary: For a long time, he’d been content to spend the rest of his life running from the past. Then she shows up in her underwear and things get a lot better.Snippets of Atton Rand and the Jedi Exile’s relationship during and after KOTOR 2. 99% canon compliant.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I finally got around to playing KOTOR 2 and it did not disappoint. My one complaint: Atton and the Exile deserved better! Seriously, no romance options despite such developed characters? I felt robbed. Naturally, I decided to write this story for myself, my boyfriend, and all the other Atton/Exile fans out there who wanted more. It was originally just going to be a one-shot with several quick scenes, but I realized I wanted it to be more fleshed out than that. This is meant to be canon compliant (with perhaps a few minor exceptions), so this can be fully integrated into the KOTOR 2 narrative. It probably goes without saying, but spoilers for KOTOR 2 and eventually, early SWTOR. They're great games and I can't recommend them enough. Hope you enjoy!

Atton Rand has had no shortage of crazy adventures in the last thirty-some odd years of his life, but crossing a fuel line with a hot Jedi in an attempt to escape a mining facility while a creepy Jedi battles something that looks like it’s been decaying for years may shape up to be the craziest yet. The idea of the existence of a hot Jedi and a creepy Jedi seems to be an anomaly, but he’s certainly not complaining about the former.

When the hot one first showed up by his cell, he really thought he was dreaming; she certainly looked like a dream, after all, especially standing there in only her underwear. The more he talked to her, the more he thought she simply was a dream, even after he realized she was a Jedi. She didn’t talk or act like any of the Jedi he’d ever known. That or he just hasn’t talked to a woman for some time.

He desperately needs to up his flirting game, though. Her running around half-naked would be distracting…for the droids? _Really?_ He may as well have just admitted to her that he hasn’t had sex in over two standard years!

If he wants to change that, he’s going to have to get off Peragus alive, though. It may prove to be even more challenging than it was supposed to be five minutes ago, now that the hot Jedi is claiming that it feels like her very intact hand has been cut off and insists that the creepy Jedi has been seriously injured despite being very far from her eyesight.

“I have a bad feeling about this,” he says under his breath.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is meant to establish the beginning of KOTOR 2 and some of Atton's initial impressions since what happens on the Peragus Mining Facility is in real time without any breaks for missing dialogue. It doesn't really follow the more lengthy and dialogue-heavy narrative you'll see in future chapters. I recommend you read the next chapter before deciding if this fiction is for you.


	2. Chapter 2

Atton’s initial conversations on the Ebon Hawk leave him with more questions than answers. The hot Jedi, Meetra Surik, fought in the Mandalorian Wars and was exiled from the Jedi Order after. Curious, as Atton was told during the Jedi Civil War that every Jedi that fought the previous war had followed Revan. Apparently, she was also cut off from the Force after the Mandalorian Wars, but is just now starting to feel it again.

The story might just be crazy enough to make sense, though. Her survival and extreme tactics on the Peragus Mining Facility are consistent with the skills of a Jedi or a war veteran. He swears he had seen her in the Soresu and Shii-Cho stances that Jedi use for lightsaber combat when she fought the droids in the facility with her vibrosword. Most interesting is that she corrected his purposefully false statement regarding Revan’s gender. Most of the galaxy, for whatever odd reason, thought Revan was a woman and Malak was her lover. Malak obviously hated that, but Revan went along with it in hopes of people underestimating him. That, and it gave him an excuse to always keep his face covered, an odd tendency he’d had since he left the Jedi for war.

Atton swears he felt something trying to probe his mind not long before Meetra found him in the force cage. He’d been counting cards in his head, but then he got a good look at her and figured imagining certain base lusts would be more effective. It worked fairly quickly, much faster than it took for her to clap back at his overly flirtatious remarks. Granted, those were just him being self-indulgent after his long imprisonment. He played dumb with her on purpose in hopes of throwing her off as to his true identity. He’d been concerned that the Jedi or Sith had come to punish him for his misdeeds during the Jedi Civil War. But Meetra, despite her talents, didn’t show any signs of a being with command over the Force that he’d been trained to look for when he hunted Jedi.

Kreia is a different story. She shows many signs of a Force user, even though he doesn’t get a Jedi vibe from her. She gets creepier the more speaks to him, and it wouldn’t take someone especially gifted to recognize she knows a lot more than she’s letting on. He’s actually relieved that Kreia had implied him to be a fool. It means she hasn’t successfully probed his mind. Perhaps there’s no danger, but he knows it’s never that simple.

“Are you sure you don’t need some sleep?” someone asks him. It’s Meetra, back again from what he presumes to be another long talk with Kreia. He’d spoken to her hours before, but admittedly he’d been in a bad mood, and it seemed like she was too. Not unusual given the day or so they’ve had.

She takes a seat beside him in the copilot’s chair and he takes her in. Given the water dripping off her, he figures she was showering instead of talking to the old witch. He didn’t even realize there was a refresher on this ship. Granted, he hasn’t left the cockpit since takeoff.

Meetra’s dark, wet hair clings to her cheeks and drips onto her tunic, which hugs her curvy, but small frame nicely. Atton tries not to stare, and focuses on her face instead. She has the palest blue eyes he’s ever seen. He also notices for the first time how full her lips are. In her natural state, she’s not just hot like he had assessed earlier; she’s beautiful. But his time on Nar Shaddaa has taught him not to chase a woman for beauty alone. Not that Meetra seems like the type that tries to kill him in his sleep, though.

“I’m good. I’ll sleep when we land on Telos safely,” he tells her, trying to hide any irritation in his voice that is undoubtably being caused by his lack of sleep.

She raises her eyebrow as to question him, but refrains from mentioning it. “Have you had any ration bars?” she asks instead.

“I’ve eaten enough ration bars in the last few hours to make up for all the meals lost in miner prison and more,” he admits.

“That bad, huh?”

“Well, being in that force cage probably saved my life,” he admits. “That is, if we land on Telos without getting shot down by another warship.”

“We’re past the asteroid field and I’m pretty sure the explosion kept anything near Peragus from tailing us. You have nothing to worry about. Just get some sleep or take a shower or something. I’ll be fine monitoring our trip while the ship’s on autopilot.”

“You trying to get me out of the cockpit?” He tries to sound goodhearted to hide his paranoia and annoyance, but the look on her face tells him she doesn’t buy it.

“Look,” she tells him sternly, “I get that trusting people is probably a horrible idea if you’re trying to survive on Nar Shaddaa and that this whole situation we’re in is insane to say at the least, but you’re going to have to trust me for a little bit longer if you want to make it to Telos without losing your mind from sleep deprivation or malnourishment.”

He hates how right she is. He didn’t think Jedi knew anything outside what came from holocrons, the Jedi Code, and some ancient library on Coruscant. But he guesses at least one of them had a mission on Nar Shaddaa at some point.

“I feel a bit like I’m in some kind of holodrama,” he admits.

“I didn’t know there were holodramas of the action-adventure genre.” Perhaps she is somewhat sheltered.

He’s not sure if his eyes flickering shut gives him away or if it’s his lack of witty responses. Either way, she seems to note his drowsiness and unwillingness to be stubborn with her and rises from her seat. “Get some sleep, Atton. There are two different crew quarters on opposite ends of the ship.”

“I’m good,” he says softly as she rises from her seat.

“Oh, and if you’re planning on flirting mercilessly with more women on Telos, you may stand a better chance if you shower first. You kind of smell,” she says, giggling softly before walking off. At least he thinks that’s what she says, but he’s so far gone he can’t be sure.

He succumbs to sleep not long after she leaves. She returns a few minutes later, chuckling to herself about the smuggler’s stubborn ways as she drapes an old robe of hers over him.


	3. Chapter 3

He dreams of the thing that’s been haunting him for years. Perhaps the worst part of it is that no matter how many times it persists, each dream has its own unique feature—one small detail that changes or stands out and it tortures him until the next dream. And he knows he deserves it.

He watches as his former self kills the Jedi that saved him, and there’s nothing he can do about it. Despite the attempt to be quick, it’s nowhere near quick enough. Then he watches helplessly as the old him flips the body over with the intent of closing her eyes, a sign of respect he had never given any of the others he killed, only to find her face replaced with Meetra’s.

He wakes up in a cold sweat, panting heavily.

“Atton?” someone says quietly.

He remembers that he’s on house arrest on Telos along with the others. He looks to his right to find Meetra sitting up in her bed, looking at him with a confused expression. Kreia remains asleep in the far bed. He’s not sure in this scenario who he’d rather have see him like this.

“Bad dream?” Meetra asks him, her voice slightly groggy.

He looks down at his bed as he tries to slow his panting with deep breaths.

“Good dream…?” she tries after he calms down.

Huh, so she has a sex drive _and_ a sense of humor. Interesting development.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” he says, hoping it will distract her from the moment of weakness he just displayed.

“Quite a claim coming from the same guy who told me about his sexual fantasy of being interrogated by a woman in her underwear within _five minutes_ of meeting me.” She sounds amused now, a massive improvement over her being worried.

“I never said it was a _sexual_ fantasy,” he says, making eye contact with her for the first time since he woke up. Her hair is down and slightly tangled. It’s longer than he expected. She’s wearing the same clothes she’s been wearing, probably for the sake of modesty and because the rest of her equipment was confiscated.

“Oh, silly me. Clearly it was some kind of work-related fantasy,” she says sardonically.

He hopes she enjoys using her quick wit as much as he enjoys listening to it. He also can’t help but wonder what she wears to bed when she isn’t concerned with modesty, and if it’s anything like what he saw when he first met her. Then he remembers it’s probably a bad idea to mentally undress her during his half-assed attempt to pretend he isn’t ridiculously sexually attracted to her.

“I’m sorry if I woke you up,” he tells her, sincerely.

She swings her feet over the side of her bed, turning to face him. “You didn’t,” she assures him. “I just don’t sleep well. I never have. Sorry for asking about your dream; I suppose that’s a bit too personal. I know I wouldn’t want to explain my dreams to most people.”

He untangles his legs from the sheets and turns to sit facing her. Like Meetra, he wears the same clothes he’s been wearing the past few days, minus the jacket and holster. It’s not the most comfortable, but he’s not about to take his shirt off to reveal the scars from his war days that are a bit too serious for the mere smuggler he’s claimed to be. “It’s fine; I’m sure it was a well-intentioned question. I don’t exactly sleep well either, and the many attempts on our lives in the last week haven’t exactly helped remedy that. Tell me, do people usually try to kill you wherever you go?”

“Not since the Mandalorian Wars, but that was understandable. There’s something highly unusual about all these attacks since I boarded the Harbinger. Almost like everyone knew exactly where I’d be,” she says, concern evident in her voice. “Oh, and that reminds me. I wanted to thank you for saving us from that Exchange thug a few days ago.”

“You fought him, too,” he reminds her.

“I meant before that. He probably would’ve just overloaded the force cages to kill us had you not goaded him into fighting us. It was smart, using his ego against him like that,” she tells him sincerely.

He tries to play it off, because deep down, he knows he’s not worthy of her praise. “Eh, even fools get lucky sometimes. Also, if you haven’t noticed, I’m pretty familiar with the arrogant and the proud.”

She gets off the bed and walks over to him, placing a hand on his arm. “You’re not a fool, Atton. Don’t listen to Kreia,” she tells him sternly. “And if I had to guess, I’d say you’re nowhere near as cocky as you come off at first. You’re a lot more charming now than you were at the facility.”

She steps away to sit by the foot of her bed and begins to meditate. Atton lays down and tries to go back to sleep despite knowing it will never happen, not after _that_. He should be afraid that she sees right through him, but he’s not. He knows now that he was right when he met her on Peragus II. Meetra is an absolute dream, and he’s both terrified and thrilled by his attraction to her and what it could mean for his future.


	4. Chapter 4

“Do you ever think about what your life would’ve been like if it weren’t for the Jedi?” he asks Meetra one night in their Telos apartment. As much as he hates doing errands for strangers while they wait for the Ebon Hawk to be found, it’s still way better than being under house arrest. With Kreia nowhere to be found doing…whatever it is that Kreia does, it almost feels like home.

The small part of him that hasn’t been tainted with the cynicism that comes from experiencing total galactic war even feels these errands may be worthwhile for the devastated planet. And as much as he’d vehemently deny it to anyone who asked, he enjoys being part of something bigger than himself. Something noble, maybe even heroic.

“Atton, I’ve spent the better part of the last decade with very little to do but reflect on my life, my choices, and my regrets. I’ve thought about and questioned everything I’ve ever done,” Meetra tells him firmly but somberly as she walks over to the window overlooking the city. “Do you? You know, think about alternate paths you could have taken in life?”

The correct answer is yes, probably even more than she has, but he doesn’t say that. “I think everyone does,” he tells her instead, joining her in staring at the traffic out the window.

“So then why did you ask?” She turns her head between looking at him and out the window as she leans forward against the glass.

She has him there. He wants to get to know her, he really does. Except that’s kind of difficult to do when he doesn’t want her to _really_ know him, or at least who he was during the Jedi Civil War. “I don’t know. Being a Jedi just seems like a very committed and different lifestyle than most, I guess. Seems like not a lot of freedom, which would drive me crazy.”

She thinks for a bit before speaking. “It was different, yes, and quite a commitment. I’d say we still had more freedom than most in the galaxy. Some of the Outer Rim planets I saw in exile had more slaves than free people. Well, you’re probably aware of that, having grown up on Nar Shaddaa.”

“Yeah, I know about the underground slave trade industry there. Never got involved; too dirty, even for me.” Atton finds himself frowning as he says the words, even the end bit that he would normally say with a cocky smirk. Proof that being around this woman really is shaping him more than he could have construed. He pauses before deciding there’s no harm in her knowing about his birthplace. “I actually grew up on Alderaan. Didn’t stay there long, though.”

“You must have hated it there,” she says bluntly, startling him. She must have noticed that, because she follows up with, “The politics and the nobles, I mean. I’m sure they get on most people’s nerves.”

“Did you just use one of your Jedi mind tricks or something?” he plays off like it’s a joke, which it partially is, while he begins his longstanding routine of counting pazaak cards in his head.

“No, I’m still too far from truly feeling the Force like I once did to do that. And even if I wasn’t, it still seems like kind of a rude thing to do,” she smiles sheepishly. “I spent a couple months on Alderaan with Master Kavar years ago. It was one of those diplomacy missions I’ve never been fond of. The nobles from House Organa and House Thul we worked with were pompous, obnoxious, and out of touch. Nothing seemed to come of that mission.”

He’s pretty sure she’s telling the truth, especially after he had that conversation with Kreia about a Jedi being useless without the Force. It was by far the most pleasant conversation they’ve had, and he was still uncomfortable and somewhat bothered by it. “Those families? They wouldn’t stop fighting if someone blew up the planet.”

“Them and the rest of the galaxy.” She turns to face him fully, leaning on her shoulder against the window pane. “I never would’ve guessed you were from Alderaan, though, and I mean that as a compliment.”

He tries to play it cool, nodding slightly to thank her. He does his best to keep a neutral face as he watches her gaze at the stars and then back at him, her expression blank.

“I never actually knew where I was born. For all I know, I could have been from some obnoxious noble family on Alderaan. Or a slave on Kessel. Growing up, I just associated Dantooine as my homeworld and the Jedi Order as my family.” She looks a bit sad as she speaks, and he feels a bit guilty for bringing up the topic in the first place.

“So, in this metaphorical Jedi family, who was your husband?” he asks before he can consider how the conversation will play out. Again, he plays it like a joke despite knowing it’s not funny.

“You know, you already brought up the husband thing before on Peragus while doing a really bad job at pretending not to stare at my chest. If you’re trying to be subtle, it’s not working,” Meetra tells him as matter-of-factly as she can. Except he can tell that beneath all that sass is just a tiny amount of mild amusement. He wouldn’t continue if there wasn’t one.

“It’s never been a talent of mine,” he responds coyly.

She sighs under her breath before speaking. “The customs of marriage and having children were completely foreign to me growing up as a Jedi. If anything, I was taught to avoid them and just assumed they were things I could never experience. I thought about them during the war and my exile, but they just seemed too distant after all those years with the Jedi to really understand. It’d be like trying to imagine a desert planet like Tatooine when you’ve spent your whole life freezing on Hoth.”

“So the Jedi really are incapable of love?” It’s something he was told often when he was trained to torture and break the Jedi, probably as a means to dehumanize them. He just doesn’t truly believe now that they could feel so little, especially Meetra.

“On the contrary. You’re thinking of the Order forbidding attachment, which often accompanies love, especially of the romantic and family variety. The Jedi wouldn’t have to drill those lessons into our brains if we weren’t capable of feeling them in the first place. In fact, I’d say one would at least need to possess the ability to love to truly command the light side of the Force. It’s those on the dark side that couldn’t love anyone if they tried.” She takes note of his confused expression. “But I was exiled for doing what I thought was right by doing what I thought was helping people in a time of war, so I probably have no idea.”

“So you’re saying it would possible for you.” He quickly adds, “For all Jedi and former Jedi to love.”

She nods, and he breathes a sigh of relief. He might just have a fighting chance with her, and maybe even have some dignity to spare.


End file.
